Chapter One: Make America Great Again

Greatness is not a birthright. It’s not a self-granted title. It is not guaranteed. America has been great. Overthrowing our corporate and colonial masters was great. Inventing sustained flight and landing on the moon in the same century was great. The highway system is great. The internet is … Fine. All of those things were … Continue Reading

Reporting, Clickbait, and Fake News: A Guide for the Woefully Uninformed

I am hearing the phrase “Fake News” thrown around a lot by idiots on Twitter. I thought it might be nice to define the following terms so that we can finally have a common lexicon by which we can fully and collaboratively discuss our misery. I will discuss the facts of a story, in the styles … Continue Reading

Trump Tweets Flag Trap – Two Reasons Not To Fall For It

  Nobody should be allowed to burn the American flag – if they do, there must be consequences – perhaps loss of citizenship or year in jail! — Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) November 29, 2016 It’s a trap. Do not burn the flag to protest Trump’s latest tweet: This is a brilliant strategy, probably from … Continue Reading

Christmas Banksy


Before the Christmas Break

I have decided to take a break from politics for the Christmas season. In order to do that, I need to get a few things off my chest. 1) The US should accept Syrian refugee families and provide safe housing for noncombatants and those who wish to remain in the country. Its not our job … Continue Reading

On the Election of Trump and the Five Stages of Grief

While Kübler-Ross’s five stages of grief may not be linear (or even accurate), I find myself trapped in them when considering President-Elect Trump. Denial: I find the phrase “I just can’t believe it” popping into my head frequently. But of course I can believe it- and I know just who to blame. Then, I start … Continue Reading

Bad Words

I don’t mean swear words. I mean bad words. These words are pissing me off right now. Feels (As a noun, unforuntately) “Watching that video of the person hugging the dying kid always gives me the feels.” A person does not get “The Feels”, they have feelings. It is okay to have feelings, they are … Continue Reading

Ashley Madison Alibis

  The Ashley Madison database has been dumped on the internet, according to Brian Krebs. In it are contained a list of the service’s customers, people who paid money to have a discreet affair. It is going to be very difficult for these guys to talk their way out of it, but as a public service- … Continue Reading

A cup on the T

A cup is taking up a seat on the T. Nobody is upset, they barely notice. They don’t care if there is stuff inside it. If anything, they hope the cup is already emptied, lest something spill over on to them. Its just a discarded cup, and if it mattered to anyone it wouldn’t be on … Continue Reading

Hawaii II Anthem

Cards Against Humanity recently gave a square foot of a private island to customers of their Ten Days or Whatever of Kwanza promotion/spectacle/stunt. They are now asking for an anthem, and I am humbling submitting this original work for consideration. One Square Foot of Freedom Out of the mist, rising from the waters, The future … Continue Reading